Debug the humbug..

Dr Patwardhan forwarded this story some time back:
I have taken the liberty to edit and put in my own inputs( in italics)


An OLD FABLE:
TRADITIONAL VERSION

The diligent Indian ant works hard all summer in the sweltering heat building his house and saving up supplies for the winter. On the other hand, the grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter and he dies out in the cold.

MODERN VERSION

BBC, CNN and NDTV show up taking pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be that this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house. Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other grasshoppers demanding that grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter.

Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticize the Indian Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the grasshopper. The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the grasshopper. Opposition MPs stage a walkout. Left wing parties call for "Bharat Bandh".

Uttar Pradesh demands a Judicial Enquiry and immediately passes a law preventing ants from working hard in the heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among ants and grasshoppers. Lallu Prasad also allocates one free coach to Grasshoppers on all Indian Railway Trains, aptly named as the 'Grasshopper Rath'.

Arjun Singh announces a Special Reservation for Grass Hoppers in educational institutions and all public Services and finally, the Judicial Committee drafts and implements the Prevention of Terrorism Against Grasshoppers Act (POTAGA).

Failing to comply with POTAGA and not having enough to pay retroactive taxes, the ants home is confiscated by the Government and handed over to the grasshopper in a ceremony covered by CNN, BBC, and NDTV.

Arundhati Roy calls it "A triumph of justice". Laloo calls it 'Socialistic Equalization'. The BJP calls it the 'revolutionary resurgence of the downtrodden' and Kofi Annan invites the grasshopper to address the UN General Assembly.

IN THE MEANTIME
In the meantime the Indian Ants at the behest of their cousins the American Carpenter Ants have long since migrated to the US and built up multi million dollar companies in the silicon valley.
Mean while, millions of grasshoppers continue to die of starvation in India despite the reservation and special conditions provided by the government.

THE FINAL OUTCOME:
A lot of hard working ants are lost from the mother land , grasshoppers have divided themselves into the the genuine grasshoppers, the ones who want to hop on to the bandwagon,and the ones on Grass who wanted revolution against the ants.They all end up fighting against one another, called the ants the traitors, there was a community of leeches ( including the likes of Jejune Singh,RamUdaas Passthewine and a too sexy guy who wears dark glasses all the time)who came, saw the chaos and cashed in on the sentiment and won the election, the communist frogs protested that it was not fair at all- they were not sure what was not fair when asked, but it was nice to protest they thought- and so the story goes on.....


MORAL OF THE STORY:

In the words of Dr ShaanBUG,(grasshopper representative in chief, chief patriot,expert stonethrower and fencesitter, aspirational leader)

"We bugs are a beautiful monstrosity. Our beauty lies in our diversity, though we keep bickering with each other we come together beautifully in national spirit during events such as hockey movies and protest rallies . Karan Johar has made a moving montage on this - we would love to show after the censors edit the communally disturbing parts - its about our all encompassing spit...oops typo..spirit- its called HUM-BUG."
"And lets kill all the butterflies for their non involvement in this."